Tag Archives: random

Chatty Cathies…

May 19, 2011 Naturally Alise 4 Comments

GChatty Cathies... or something to that effect.

Except our names aren’t Cathy, we aren’t dolls, and we aren’t white. So basically the same. -_- You have witnessed some of the chat adventures of me and my buddy Cheekie. We have decided to share some of the randomness that fills our days. We like to share the laughter, because we are benevolent and kind. Oh yeah, and we are awesome.

me: how my daddy so hood and mama so not,   that would explain me I guess, shruglife

Cheekie: opposites attract dinna mug, scientific couple

me: ology dinnamug.  any ology

Cheekie: I wish that was a major in my college:  anyology. Would be perfect for my randomness

me: I want to major in analogy!

Pookie is to crack as Alise is to Simply Lemonade

Stuff like that, that would be fun

Cheekie: analogies is the bomb

Yeah, this is the stuff we talk about. Class acts we are. No Kid N’ Play. Analogies are fun though; the way we do them is anyway. It is nerdy fun, but fun nonetheless. Don’t judge us. Judy. Here are some foolish analogies we came up with:

me: Sharpei Puppy: Drake :: Pound Puppy: Teyana Taylor

Cheekie: Holy Water : Vampires :: Raid : Flava Flav

Foolish, right?

This day me and Cheekov (Cheekie’s Russian alter ego I created) were being our usual random selves and she posted a status of: “Cheekus Carnivorous.” Yeah, she is such a weirdo, I keep her around though because I am a glutton for punishment.

me: Cheekus Carnivorius? Bwahahaahaaa!

Cheekie: snort

me: I am a VeAliceRaptor, it is on my birf certificate… not the birth one

Cheekie: the raptors were my fave in Jurassic Park

me: they rocked socks, but not those creepy toe socks

Cheekie: mannn the description of them eating your insides while you’re alive was my favorite moment ever. i was an evil child.

me: at least you are consistent

Cheekie: o_O

me: i don’t make the news, I just report it

The VeAliceRaptor is coming, get your house in order!

I call this chat, “Symptom Unknown,” lol…

me: Lovin’ It! Little Brother.

i don’t know why I am feeling all Drakey today

Cheekie: drakey, lol

me: probably a symptom of some terminal illness

Cheekie: as i imagined his picture next to the definition

me: imma tell my doc that

Cheekie: “I’m feeling quite drakey today. Young moolah.”

me: been feeling nauseous and Drakey.

Cheekie: that should be a diagnosis on webmd

me: i agree

Cheekie: f*ck a gout

I call this chat “Silence of the Chats”

me: from my tumblr dashboard:  “Have you ever been stared at so intensely that it seems as though the person is trying to imagine what a dress made from your skin and a hat made from your ‘fro would look like?”

Cheekie: um.  wild bill game proper?

me:   it puts the lotion on its skin…

Cheekie: or else it gets the hose again…   boompow

me: no Black Eyed Peas.

Cheekie: PLEASE no Black Eyed Peas

gratuitous Silence of the Lambs creepy pic for Cheekie.

This is why you should be our Gchat friends. Your life would be more awesome, I guarantee it!

Poetry

this makes sense… (#1)

April 13, 2011 Naturally Alise 3 Comments

a poem a day for National Poetry Month: revisiting a poem post from 9/16/10 from my “this makes sense” series of random poetic musings, check out the entire series and tell me what ya think:

I just wrote this totally random poem. It might not make sense, but I don’t think I particularly care. It just was a stream of consciousness thing I had to get out. Thanks for reading y’all, it means way more than I think any of you realize….

"I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells" Dr. Seuss

#fact

i believe in love

but

i’m pretty sure i hate everything

and i’m almost convinced

that

everything hates me

call me a cynic

but that’s not my name

yeah, i probably do hate everything

but i survive

on love

this makes sense

on some planet

where i fit in without changing

where my square pegness

fits into a divine round (w)holeness

where even my pessimism is hopeful

and imagination is my reality

where nothing makes sense

but everything does

and i can hate everything

and love you.

yes, this makes sense.

Make sure to check this one out too… It is my second favorite in the series…

laughs, Slang Fridays

Questionable Quotes

March 11, 2011 Naturally Alise Leave a comment

you can quote me...

No Slang Fridays today *insert sad pouting tantrum*, been a busy bee this week, hence the lack of posts. However, I want to share with you some other foolishness I have in the works with my partners in ratchet crime: Beez and Cheekie. We have created a Tumblr blog entitled “See What They Had Said…” (questionablequotes.tumblr.com). The premise of the blog is to find crazy/silly/strange quotes and attribute them to someone who didn’t actually say them but somehow relates. It sounds not quite right all written out, so I will show you a few examples me and the ladies have cooked up over the past couple weeks. Good times. Stop by some time and check us out! Happy Friday!

from Beez...

“‘Cause I see some ladies tonight that should be havin’ my baby, baby…”

~Thomas Jefferson

from Cheekie...

“Reppin’ my town, when you see me you know everything black and yellow, black and yellow, black and yellow, black and yellow.”

~ The Scripps Bee

from me...

“Real G’s move in silence like lasagna.”

~Chef Boyardee

Yep, basically some stone cold foolishness… just the way I like. You can also submit your own questionable quotes here. Next week I will be back with a fantastic Slang Friday that will surely not disappoint. Enjoy your weekend!

Poetry

a mess…

January 12, 2011 Naturally Alise 4 Comments

Random poem/musings I wrote a few weeks ago after seeing this on tumblr:

I'm warning you now before you get too involved. I'm a fucking mess.

no really, i am.

sometimes i’m a little goofy

i’m a bit clumsy and i knock things over

and some days I cry for no reason when i’m happy

and some days i smile when i’m hurt

and i don’t say what i mean sometimes

i don’t mean what I say some days

sometimes i foget what i’m saying mid senstence

and sometimes i don’t really forget but i just lose the courage to say it

and some days I am a little too silly

so you can’t see that i’m sad

and sometimes I’m mean to people who love me

but i can admit that i’m wrong

i’m a mess

but you love me in spite of

or maybe because or

but for whatever reason,

remember that sometimes i forget to say thank you.

made me think of one of my favorite songs by Alanis Morisette: “Everything”…

General

coffee shop revelations…

November 11, 2010 Naturally Alise 2 Comments

gonna stop crying over spilled coffee... this makes sense...

I am sitting in the coffee shop, my favorite spot to loiter. And this is what happened:

Log on to facebook and complain about my sh*tty morning dealing with a completely wack family situation.

Log onto Twitter and complain about all the things I have to work on.

Log on to Gchat and complain about some blog stuff.

Log on to my brain and internally complain about money and some more sh*t.

Sip on my yummy hot coffee.

Glance out the window.

Homeless man digging in the trash for cans and possibly food.

Thank God all I have are my “first-world” problems.

Sip coffee.

This day me and Cheekov (Cheekie’s Russian alter ego I created) were being our usual random selves and she posted a status of: “Cheekus Carnivorous.” Yeah, she is such a weirdo, I keep her around though because I am a glutton for punishment.

I call this chat, “Symptom Unknown,” lol…

I call this chat “Silence of the Chats”

poetry, love, & laughs