I wanna see the receipts…
Last night I had a Whitney Houston moment. No, I did not go on an insane drug binge with errant wigs. However, I did utter a remix of her famous phrase: “I wanna see the receipts!” Let me replay the scene.
classic moment. cracky moment too, but classic nonetheless.
I am taking care of my 8 and 9 year old cousins for the entire summer. My grandmother wanted me to take them to Vacation Bible School this week, of course I agreed because there is no arguing with grandmothers. While the kids went off to their separate classes the adults had a class. The class was going well until….
[blackbirdpie url=”http://twitter.com/NaturallyAlise/status/83365628936859648″]
I just could not help myself. Her statement was so off the wall and completely made-up that all my church decorum went out the stained glass window. This is why I will never have nice things, or as I tell Cheekie: “You will never possess anyhing of quality.”
[blackbirdpie url=”http://twitter.com/NaturallyAlise/status/83365772847620096″]
Y’all pray for me. I wanna see the receipts from your prayers!
Hilarious!
Girl…Stop sassing those folks.
It just came out before I could stop myself!!! I know somebody gonna tell on me, watch my grandma be fussing at me by the end of the week… smh
Yeah you’re going to hear about that. So did she show the receipts? Ha!
You sassed a lady of the Lawd?! A justifier of Jeebus?!!
http://bit.ly/mBrkat
Sigh.
As I cackle on the low… oh, wayment, he still see me doe… dammit! I mean… darnit!
I absolutely cannot with you and by cannot, I mean I LOVE YOU!
First off, you have to tell these people out here in these church thingies to quit playing games with the Lord. Saying He said stuff he DID NOT SAY. I HATE THAT. As a matter of fact, I just deleted a whole diatribe (cause I’m here to comment, not write a post) in this very comment box about a phrase people put in the Bible that IS NOT IN THERE and I stay asking for the receipts on. Still ain’t got none.
Secondly, your filter “be broke sometimes…” ok… and I can’t breathe. Just keep on being epic ou’chea… keep on, because I’ma be reading and laughing. reading and laughing.
#shoutout to cheekie who gave me hiccups the other day.
There are a lot of “church phrases” that people say that are not in not nary a verse in the good book, but I am determined to find this verse : “Church folks have a seat.” I’ll get back to ya on that one!
Your filter is broke? Mmmmmhmmmm…Show me the receipt for said filter.
I think that is the perfect response in many church-related situations. You can’t just be covering up your rudeness with scripture. NAW it don’t work that way.
“you came out the house looking like THAT? Well, the bible says…”
GTFOHWTFCB
(get the f outta here w that fake christian bullsh*t)
l